All I keep thinking this evening was that there were still so many things I wanted to say. And ask.
I don't have any guilt or true regrets. We did the best we could to come and see her, and to be in contact with her. I called until calling was impractical. I emailed. I did all I could. She knew we loved her and I knew she loved us. and so it's not guilt. It's just loneliness.
4 comments:
((((((hugs))))))
Oh that sense of loss.
Thank you for your posts on grieving following the loss of your mother. I am so sorry for your loss. My mother died a week ago today. She was much older, I think, than your mother, and her time had come.
She and I were not close, and our relationship was a difficult one, but she was my mother, a fundamental part of my life and I grieve the person she was never able to be, and the loss for myself and my brother of what we didn't have. No matter the particulars of ones relationship, I guess there is no easy way to do this.
All the family left yesterday, and I am so weary from all the thank you's and public-ness surrounding her funeral. Reading your posts about your loss and grief is a gift to me; someone ahead of me on this grief-trail. I am hoping your find resting spots on your trail, and healing places.
Dawn, I'm so sorry for your loss. And for the loss of the chance at changing your relationship as well.
My mother was 84, so she had lived quite a long life, but it is never easy.
I have good days, bad days, and lots of moments of joy, and sorrow, and tears. But life has a way of keeping on, and that is okay.
Wishing you peace in your journey - please come and visit the blog often.
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